Monday, March 8, 2010

Smokes! Snacks! Seats! New 7-11 opens! Hurray!


It's here, at last!! The new 7-11 appears to have opened, on 8th Avenue, off the corner of 37th Street. E was spotted a short while ago, making her debut visit, and our reporter on the scene noted that her purchases included a hazelnut coffee, a rice pudding snack and a pack of Newports.


E, who rarely carries cash on her (largely because she has none), is particularly pleased by the convenience of now being able to buy cigarettes with a credit or debit card. She is also thrilled by the coffee selection, as well as the lovely assortment of tasty creamers to complement the brew.


The new establishment is vast and bright, offers mezzanine seating, perfect for grabbing a quick bite, or to take a peaceful break from the daily grind, with a cup of coffee and a sudoku. This is indeed a much-welcome improvement to the neighborhood and the local community at large.


The Council, back at The Lair, has yet to issue a statement regarding the opening. We will keep you posted throughout the day, should they choose to speak.

TOP STORY: The Council is disgruntled by yet another Monday...

Spirits were low this morning at The Lair, as Head Council Member E stirred from her slumber in order to face yet another Monday, head-on. Lord Dreidel and Baron von Dracula were standing by as E prepared to venture forth. Preparations were brief, as time was of the essence. The mood was somber, and the lighting, dim. All Council Members declined to comment on the proceedings.