TOP STORY: Head Council Member E to form a coalition to eradicate Mondays

After an unfortunate string of occurences that occurred this morning and afternoon, Head Council Member E has developed a plan to initiate a coalition to official ban Mondays from the calendar. E plans to seek The Council's cooperation on the matter. Although our reporting staff is still piecing together the events that caused this revolutionary decision, so far, we have deduced the following:

1. E wakes up this morning, and it is grim and rainy.
2. she wakes up late, is out of cigarettes, and has no time to make coffee before departing from The Lair for the day
3. The bodega was out of Newports, which caused her to have to cross the street, and wait on an annoying line at the pharmacy, before getting a pack.
4. Of the three Metrocard vending machines at the station, not one of them was accepting credit or debit cards, so she missed her train while trying to scrounge for the change needed to put enough money on her card to pay her fair (it is a well-known fact that E rarely carries cash, since she really doesn't have any, as most of her earning go to maintaining The Lair.)
5. In the city, still raining.
6. Late to work, where an unusually dreary atmosphere lurked about.
7. Vegetable dumplings for lunch came accompanied by a substandard dipping sauce, which tasted suspiciously like soy sauce, instead of the tastier and more vibrant variety of special dumpling sauce.
8. The day is dragging, and an unexplainably urge for home-made apple pie has gone completely unfufilled.

For these reasons, E has decided that Mondays should be completed eliminated from the calendar. She issued the following

"Mondays have traditionally been rife with woe, despair, and bad luck in general. I feel that The Council would be doing the entire universe an incredible service by
spear-heading the coliltion to get rid of Mondays...FORVER!"

The Council has not yet been made away of E's plans, and she has not yet specified when they would be approached. She may wait for the controversy involving Limited Time Offer Skillet to simmer down (ha?) before she broaches The Council with this pressing matter.

It is also unclear as to whether Monday will be replaced by an entirely new day, or if Sunday will be doubled, or essentially repeated, hence resulting in a 7-day week, with 2 Sundays, to be immediately followed by Tuesday.

We welcome our readers thoughts and comments on this controversial matter, and we will provide up-to-the-minute updates on this story, as they become available.